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Ha ha ha ha—yeah, that is a very good one. No, after being crushed within the fourth such what-should-I-do ballot in latest days (within the others he requested how lengthy the journalists he lied about ought to stay suspended and requested customers to validate his no-links-to-competing-sites insurance policies) he is now relying on his favored sycophants to inform him that no, it would not depend as a result of his enemies are all “bots” or no matter.
Oh no! Now Elon thinks he didn’t actually solve the “bot” problem after all! However don’t fret, one other suck-up gave him the technical resolution he wants.
“Blue subscribers ought to be the one ones that may vote in coverage associated polls. We even have pores and skin within the sport” tweeted some dude. “Good level. Twitter will make that change,” replied Musk.
Whew, that was an in depth one. Musk virtually needed to abide by the outcomes of a ballot that did not go his manner, besides—shock!—it seems that on the polls that do not go his manner it’s as a result of The Bots have foiled him.
We have now arrived on the subsequent step of Musk’s good plan to avoid wasting Twitter: To any extent further, the principles might be determined solely among the many fanboys prepared to pay him $8 a month.
Now, that is most likely not going to occur, and an excellent many observers of the Tweetpocalypse can let you know why. The second Musk orders a brand new rule limiting votes in his quite a few “what ought to Twitter’s new guidelines be” polls is the second all of the world will get to study simply how many individuals actually are paying $8 monthly for Musk’s premium Twitter accounts. Musk’s ballot on whether or not he ought to step down collected votes from over 17 million Twitter accounts.
What number of votes do we predict a “Twitter Blue”-only ballot would get?
Musk can even probably be stepping down as Twitter head eventually, as a result of Tesla’s inventory has been completely cratering as Elon’s days of tantrums peel away his rigorously curated picture as world-saving genius. Prospects are canceling Tesla orders over his trolling, and Tesla’s inventory has now been downgraded by a Wall Avenue analyst, citing the “potential for a destructive suggestions loop” that may additional erode Twitter’s funds whereas forcing Musk to dump much more of his personal Tesla inventory, at the same time as his conduct creates “broad public backlash” that may affect Tesla as nicely.
All of that is in fact an enormous mess and getting worse by the day, and completely none of it’s going as Elon Musk deliberate when he first purchased the place and reinstated a big assortment of white nationalists and conspiracy cranks underneath the banner of “free speech.” It additionally would seem to up the chances of Musk having to unload the location at a steep loss somewhat than persevering with to dedicate his each waking hour to inventing new methods to make it suck.
That stated, let’s give some particular consideration to the handful of still-paid Twitter engineers who at the moment are tasked with instantly implementing, then tearing out, every of Elon Musk’s completely horrible concepts. They have been tasked with arising with a listing of journalists to droop—then instructed to reinstate them after Musk put up a Twitter ballot by which customers voted to undo the suspensions. Musk ordered them to jot down new code that may ban customers from tweeting out hyperlinks to Fb, Mastodon, and different competing websites—and have been quickly ordered to undo these modifications after Musk, sure, put up one other Twitter ballot to ask customers whether or not that basically ought to be the coverage.
Now, in response to yet one more ballot that did not go the best way he thought it could, the Twitter tech groups are little doubt scrambling to create some back-end flag that may make some and just some polls obtainable solely to Musk’s paid subscribers. That is quite a lot of work! It is also yet one more change that will or might not run afoul of god-knows-how-many European or American legal guidelines, as a result of there’s no one left there to verify for this stuff, and Twitter remains to be very a lot obliged to comply with the phrases of a consent settlement that requires them to tell the Federal Commerce Fee of latest product modifications earlier than implementing them.
Think about being one of many few Twitter engineers to make it by Musk’s firing spree, his demand for printouts of your work product for a Musk-led “code assessment,” his demand that staff signal a brand new loyalty assertion promising to work longer and more durable, his refurbishing of unused workplaces into makeshift bedrooms as a way to comply along with his calls for to work late and sleep within the workplace as a substitute of going house, and your reward for all of that’s that you just get to code all these Musk-demanded modifications as quick as you may and keep on the workplace late to tear them again out once more when Musk holds an on-site vote asking whether or not it was a silly concept to start with.
What a job that should be.
RELATED LINKS:
Musk bans journalists, lies concerning the purpose, and storms off in snit throughout Thursday Night time Ass-acre
Elon Musk’s Twitter bans mentions of Fb, Instagram, Mastodon, and Trump’s Reality Social
Elon Musk vows to step down as head of Twitter after taking a ballot and dropping by a mile
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